Week 4 – Guard Our Hearts

“Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”

Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

Our family went through a rough season navigating the journey of raising teenagers. Thankfully, they are now loving, kind adults who love Jesus. But, they were trying times. It’s easy to live out our Christian faith when the waters are calm, but how do we respond when the storm is raging, and we’re holding on for dear life?

Until my children reached their teenage years, my journey with Jesus seemed smooth. I had checked all the “Christian boxes” of living a nice and tidy life of faith. I committed to staying home after the birth of our second child while also obeying the Lord by homeschooling, keeping the kids involved in church activities, serving faithfully in ministry, praying daily, and volunteering at their schools, once they transitioned from homeschooling to a traditional school. I was SUPER MOM. But God knew what was in my heart.

We all have that “thing” in our family line where we try to break the cycle that was in our grandparents and our parents. For my family, one of the things was anger and aggression. I was convinced that I had overcome this dark family trait. After all, exploding in rage was “un-Christian.” Outside my home, I could hold it together and appear patient, loving, and kind. But what happens when you’re at home and there’s nowhere to escape?

During my children’s rebellious teen years, I became the worst version of myself. I said and did things I never thought I would. I didn’t recognize myself, but God did. He saw what was in my heart and wanted me to see it as well.

I often played the blame game: “I’m sorry I said that to you, but you shouldn’t have been disrespectful.” My anger became a vicious cycle of sinful outbursts cloaked in excuses and justifications. James 1:13–15 says:

“When tempted, no one should say, ‘God is tempting me.’ For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.”

I gave in to temptation over and over again and blamed everyone but myself. God was revealing that, although I was a Christian, my heart still had dark areas that needed deep work.

Proverbs 4:23 tells us to guard our hearts, for it is the wellspring of life. Jesus also warned us in the Gospels that what comes from our hearts defines us. Mark 7:21-23 (NKJV) is a sobering reminder:

“For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a man.”

Ouch! That’s a lot to take in. But here is the good news: although I was drowning in anger and self-righteousness, Jesus did not leave me there. As I confessed my sins again and again (1 John 1:9), and began listening to Jesus rather than my flesh, the pull toward ungodly anger decreased more and more.

Jesus promises in 1 Corinthians 10:13 that “God will not let us be tempted beyond what we can bear, but when we are tempted, He will provide a way out.” Finally, I started taking the way out that He provided, and as He cleansed my heart, the words and actions I so freely unleashed no longer had power over me. I wasn’t perfect, but I was free!

Friend, if you are struggling with a repetitive cycle of sin, know this: Jesus loves you, He sees you, and He is waiting for you to bring Him what He already knows is in your heart. All you have to do is ask.